The Problem With Porn
No It’s Not Those Usual Shit
So, after a day’s work, you get comfy in your bed with your laptop or smartphone… You start typing all those shallow (sometimes deep) words. You stand by your favourite team on Facebook. You forward those oft-forwarded messages to your Whatsapp buddies….
And after fooling around a little, you get triggered by the semi circles that you see on Instagram. So, you invariably fire up a new tab on your browser. You type www.x*******.com. The night outside wanes, but something else waxes inside. The more you see those special pixels, the more you feel a sense of emptiness. So, to fight this emptiness, you search for something more exciting and more exciting and more exciting…. It has started to rain outside. The moon is now shadowed by the clouds… Your work is done now.
The Next Morning…
The next morning, you get up. Yes, that funny sensation in your balls is no more. You feel light. You look out from the window. Your pretty neighbour bends to caress her dog. And you see the most serene thing in the world — cleavage. Yet, you don’t feel the same electric-shock kind of feeling that you felt when you first saw your classmate’s cleavage back in your college days. These days, you get the zing only from extreme porns. Even plain and simple porn featuring a cute girl doesn’t excite you.
Arousal has become Pavlovian to us. You get truly aroused only when you sit on the exact same bed where you do your ‘thing’. You get aroused only when those special pixels dance in front of your eyes….
See this is the problem with porn. Porn limits our sexuality to a time table!
There Was A Time When Receiving A Simple Good Morning Message Could Make Me Hard
There was a time when porn was limited to the pages of those thin magazines sold in the railway platforms of Kolkata. When Fashion TV was our Pornhub.
It was a time when girls were… girls! Words like maal (an Indian slang) or item were yet to be normalized. But neither the boys nor the girls were devoid of their sexulaity. I remember when I was in class XII, I shared an Umbrella with one of my female tuition mates. The rain, the cool breeze and the zero distance between her and me were enough to make me horny. As a chivalrous guy, I was the one holding the umbrella. The fact that my hand was just inches away from her breasts gave me goosebumps. After 15 minutes of walking (which seemed microseconds to me) we parted ways. When I returned home, I could barely concentrate on my studies. The episode of the morning kept haunting me. She texted me that night. Just a normal text message. But when I saw her name flashing on my phone screen, it somehow made me hard…
Cut to 2021. Today, porn has made us numb. Moments like the one I just mentioned seem so bland! Sharing an umbrella is no longer magical.
Sexual-Tension : It’s Getting Endangered
Just like we build the mood with foreplay before the actual love-making, there’s a thing called sexual tension that takes place even before the foreplay. It’s that subtle ‘thing’ that goes between a man and a woman (or a man and a man/ a woman and a woman) when they are together and even when they aren’t together.
I remember during my college days, a similar ‘thing’ was playing between me and a girl. I was showing her something from my copy. She came close to me — closer than what was required to see the copy clearly. I couldn’t leave the opportunity of getting a little bit closer to her. She could have backed off… But she didn’t. This was not a one off incident. There was a certain chemistry between us. She used to talk to others in one tone, but she would talk to me in a noticeably different tone. I too started getting intoxicated with her fragrance…
Cut to 2021. This sexual tension is missing between men and women. In this world of ‘ready-made’ arousal has become mathematically calculated, chronologically chained. Butterflies don’t flutter anymore in our stomachs.
Not All Is Lost, Though
Sometimes beneath this Pavlovian dystopia, you can hear your heartbeat. Sometimes, instead of focusing on the nether-regions of the porn actress, you get lost in her smiles. Sometimes you orgasm while looking at the eyes of the pornstar — just her eyes… And sometimes instead of wasting away the night watching porn, you try to introspect and write articles like these…
